24 May 08 - Heather in hospital Day 8

It's been a week now since all this started and there seems to be no end in sight.

Today, I was convinced to have a bit of a lie in and go into the hospital a little later than I’ve normally been going in. That being said, I still arrived at 9am, checked on Heather (no change from the previous night) and went for breakfast.

When I came back, the physio came along and did her standard manipulations to make sure that Heather’s muscles got some exercise. I met Dad and Jan and we walked around the hospital trying to find somewhere to get some coffee. We sat with Heather when we returned.

After they had left, I decided to read today’s paper and read selected articles to Heather, as we’d been told it would be good to talk to her. I also read her a few pages on a book she is currently reading.

I went for lunch before her parents and sister arrived. Then, about 2:30pm, we learned of a new plan to try and bring Heather around without the need to perform a tracheostomy. They want to remove her from her sedatives and let her come around naturally. However, we’ve been asked to over visit one person at a time and even then, we can’t talk to her or touch her. The reasoning being that if she comes around and gets distressed, then the relatives around her may cause additional distress which won’t be good for her.

We therefore agreed that, although it would be unpleasant for us, it was the best option for Heather. After all, a tracheostomy is a nasty thing to have to endure and no one really wants her to go down that road.

We decided to leave early and let the ICU staff do what they are best at. I went back to Ashford to spend some time with my family before returning to Canterbury. I found out that the physio had returned during the afternoon and told us that her chest now sounded clear, so a positive there. They also started to give her a transfusion at 5:15pm, as her white cell count is still too high.

So, I leave a bit disappointed that we’ve been effective “kicked out” of ICU, but they are only doing it for her ultimate good.

Must admit, I still feel very wobbly (as Heather herself would put it). I often find that one minute I’m fine, then next minute, my mind wanders and it get tearful. The hardest part for me in these times is that the one person who would comfort me in this situation is the one person who can’t.

I want her back more than ever.